Maybe the process is not as important in current society.
The process is for self-evaluation, what other people really wan to see the the product.. no matter how shitty the whole process of getting something done, it's the product that our superiors wanna c.. sounds cruel n materialistic.. but i guess that's how some of the powerful cooperations work..

As i sat quietly listening to everything around me,
i was overwhelmed by every story that everyone have to say.
The world would be such a nicer place to be in if everyone could just listen to each other a little more.. just a little.. hope that's not too much to ask for
It's human nature to be self-centered.. it's just the degree of how much
We control our thinking and actions
We are suppose to be masters of our own body
But we still lose ourselves to our own negative thinking and we reflect that in our actions..
These are things we know it very well ourselves.. but when people get depressed.. we juz dun reali wan care about the other things around us..mayb not all the time.. but most of the time i tink..

made a banner today.. lol din reali help much though..wonder how things will turn out.. haha.. oh well.. no matter what.. it's still gna come.. n it'll will end.. so.. juz do it! lol

i hav so much to say yet i dunno if they should be said or not..
i hav so much to say i dunno wad will be the consequences if i say..
i hav so much to say i cant remember wad i wanted to say..
i hav so much to say tat i'm too tired to say..

having hols now.. suppose to feel more relaxed than normal sch days..but that doesn't seem to be the case.. why do i see things happenning but there seems to be nothing to be done?

back to my old phrase.. when things cant be changed.. we can onli accept it.. it might juz make a person to accept things as the way they are even without thinking of changing it..dam..
humans r so contradicting.. sometimes when we tel ourselves what we're going to next.. we set our mind on it.. like when u see a person.. u tell urself not to behave this way.. but when the time reali comes.. we still succumb to our inner self.. dam..

my blog's getting too heavy hearted.. lol.. people tend to remember the bad times but nt the happy moments? that's nt true though.. if we think hard enough.. the fragments of happy times will still appear.. haha..

goin for ltc next week..wonder how things will turn out to be.. oh well! haha..

Dam cool =) the man himself playin too..

Went to school today to pass the key n went to Far east to check out the prices for the t shirt designs.. hmm.. kinda ex actualli.. gona try to find more quotations.. yups.. went wif yx.. i settled my lunch for one spring roll and one curry puff.. muahaha.. a meal less than 2 bucks =) not reali hungry too.. wonder why. lol, oh yeah.. den we walked to the mrt station n took the train to sim lim square, which is some where near little india. Muahaha.. yuxi wanna buy his route-ter.. ahahah... joking joking... yea.. den we were juz roaming in the shop while he tries to decide on which one to buy. ahaha.. decision making in process.. den went to meet yd for his dinner.. lol.. i wanna play FF12.. dang.. i din even play FF10..!@##$%^&^%$#@%&*&^^%$$#@#@^&..

Realised that we humans copy one another in our actions to be accepted by each other.. sounds ironic.. but i tink it's true.. we hav to leave our true self somewhere while we put on a mask outside.. not tat it's being hypocrite.. but i guess that's how humans behave.
No one wans to be left alone
No one wans to be ignored
yup.. no one..
so in the end.. you have people using one another.. you'll have cases of jealousy, unpleasant-ness and..everything else.. lol

I guess the impact i made on you wasnt as great as someone else.. lol
but wad can i do other than to accept the things the way they are now
time will never reverse.. likewise for the things we have done
you seem to hav moved on.. but mayb i nv did..
i like my mask
it keeps me away from reality
stop running away i tell myself
but i juz cant get the mask off
or is this juz another wall of distrust
i hav no idea =)

who cares man.. lol.. tried doing maclaurin! n i'm stuck at qus 2... ahahaha.. sian..

I din know i can b so useful at times =) thanks alot

ooo.. tml's the chinese A level paper le.. dun reali feel like studying also.. lol.. read through some chim chim phrases.. dunno if can remember them tml also.. oh well..

Christina Aguilera's Hurt

Seems like it was yesterday when I saw your face
You told me how proud you were, but I walked away
If only I knew what I know today
Ooh, ooh

I would hold you in my arms
I would take the pain away
Thank you for all you've done
Forgive all your mistakes
There's nothing I wouldn't do
To hear your voice again
Sometimes I wanna call you
But I know you won't be there

Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

Some days I feel broke inside but I won't admit
Sometimes I just wanna hide 'cause it's you I miss
And it's so hard to say goodbye
When it comes to this, oooh

Would you tell me I was wrong?
Would you help me understand?
Are you looking down upon me?
Are you proud of who I am?

There's nothing I wouldn't do
To have just one more chance
To look into your eyes
And see you looking back

Ohh I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself, ohh

If I had just one more day
I would tell you how much that I've missed you
Since you've been away
Ooh, it's dangerous
It's so out of line
To try and turn back time

I'm sorry for blaming you
For everything I just couldn't do
And I've hurt myself by hurting you

oh yea.. n we've got our 3rd syf piece.. lol.. i mean try out piece.. Sinfonia Nobilissima..can go sound click to check it out.. brasses parts r like dam high ba.. i've got to work on my flute sound.. it's gettin more n more lau hong.. dam.. mouth too big.. LOL.. haha..

ah.. i'm so sian lol

Where have you been
the one who smiles even in the darkest storms
the one who brings joy not to himself but to everyone around him
the one who share, care for everyone he sees

At times when things weren't going too well
when obstacles didn't seem to stop coming
when clouds covered the azure sky
when the future seems unclear

You were there to give a helping hand
to give a listening ear
to give a piece of advice
to lighten the loads of others

where have you been to

times changed and i guessed that includes you as well
how i wish you were back here

How do you help a faithless person
How do you fix a broken heart
How do you amend a broken bridge
How do you break the wall of distrust
How do you...

A nice chinese song by 南拳妈妈

If cant read this.. please go to 'View' --> 'Encoding' --> 'Unicode'

破晓

旭日击破黑夜破浪而出
没光芒如弓支支划破沉默的天穹
而你静静挽着我抑郁的双手
试图迎风而弹面海而奏
看着大人们为了生存而决斗
回头却触不及生命最终的丰硕
我看着不战而栗的那个我
黑白键上的双手开始颤抖

日晷东方滚烫意志正在酝酿
哪道光芒才是我们该遵循的方向
信念又一分一秒崩塌
粉碎边缘陪伴我的会是你还是他
落叶不停盘旋冷锋不停的吹
勇气卡住喉头使我决毅奋力不悔
静静闭上眼睛倾听心底声音
秉着弱势的勇气因为没有输的权利

窗棂旁
泪光柔和了骄阳
琴声正咀嚼着伤
而我在等待破晓的曙光
当凯旋曲开始悠扬
旭日从东方破浪
颔首期待我有一双硬肩膀

现在的我到底又在想些什么呢？

i have no idea what happened to my tagboard though.. gonna make new one.. haha.

Haze is reali bad i guess.. was juz like genting when i woke up today morning at 730.. cool huh... nooOooO.. it felt as if the throat was always occupied by something, making it dry and itchy at times..argh.. this reali shows that pollution have no boundaries! It damages the country around too.. juz like smoking.. now u see the need for the smoking area at coffee shops and anywhere.. to save those who detest smoke n stuff.. they're innocent n hav to put up wif all this nonsense..dam...

oh well.. today finalli had band after such a long break.. but argh.. stupid haze.. got some of the members sick le.. stupid.. so everyone.. please take care.. drink more water to clear throat.. and to get the so-called poisonous substance out of ur body and b healthy.. -.-II.. yeah? try to stay home at the same time... if wan go out den bring oxygen tank or get a face mask ba..the kind that can cover the whole face de.. literally.. den can protect the face from external dust and stuff..imagine the amount of particles we breathe in la.. haha.. hope it rains too.. den the first 15 mins of the rain stay indoor.. cos most polluted ma.. den corroding.. ah wad rubbish i talkin.. lol

went to watch you,me and dupree...din reali like it at first.. but was ok after that ba.. haha.. the movie had this guy who cant reali play sports.. then he was like.."I'm from the orchestra.." wah. kena shoot dao.. haha.. den at a later part of the movie he was showed wif a flute la.. then this is when gloria and yong de pat me and gave the" aww" thingy.. lol.. is it?? or is it something else.. but thanks ah.. LOL.. the movie's kinda nice.. especially the last part bah.. when both people were at their lowest points ba.. then dupree saves the day! lol.. then the movie played 'Fix You' by X& Y.. lyrics below..

When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse.

And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?

Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worthLights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you Tears stream, down your face
When you lose something you cannot replace

Tears stream down on your face And I..
Tears stream, down your face I promise you I will learn from my mistakes
Tears stream down on your face And I..
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you.

Had been doing alot of thinking these few days.. like alot la.. i continue blogging.. sleepin le.

I have absolutely no idea why am i blogging again. Lol.. today had 6 hours of paper sia.. 3 for GP and 3 for Chi in the afternoon after that.. argh.. so draining.. well.. anyway.. chinese paper was quite funny la.. guess everyone was super tired after so much restricted blood circulation and mental torture most of the people should be perked by the last paragraph of the chinese paper..Muahah.. shall keep it as a secret..

Oh my goodness... ahahha.. why am i still here blogging.. i should be mugging for Gp paper tml.. who knows what will happen for the next 2 weeks.. AHahah..

dam i reali think i'm psychic to some extent. haha.. i'm kinda know what others are thinking about things and i dun reali like tat.. ahh.. ok la.. mayb not psychic.. hahah.. oh well..

There are so many things you can tell from how a person reacts to you.. how they talk to you.. n also.. how u reply to them.. sometimes.. unknowingly.. you need to reflect on how you've been treating this particular person.. if you treat her wif uer 100%.. you expect her to treat u wif her 100%.. but i guess since this is life.. you wun get what you wished for.. so we get onli 50% in the end.. not product efficiency ba.. is that the right term? forgot le.. ahah.. oh well! Why am i even thinking of this.. hahaha.. oh well..

GOOD luck eveRyOne!

Woke up at 8 today sia.. lol went to sch to study today.. reached at 9 wif gloria..did some summation.. after that went for brunch at Mac.. i kept tripping on my own feet sia.. so ma lu.. luckily never fall down.. woah.. i'd juz wished that i fell through the ground to the core of the earth sia.. like so big le still tripping on your own feet.. Lol.

Went back to sch bout 12 plus? And i sat there all the way sia.. till 3 plus.. lol.. was reading through some chem stuff and doing grahps.. i love graphing! lol.. seems like the easiest topic to me in the whole maths syllabus la... so screwed.. lol

Den suddenly the sky turned like black.. the clouds were like moving so fast la.. it's like we dont normally pay attention to such stuff around us.. isnt it like life? when we look at it.. it seems so slow and boring.. but after everything's over.. we start thinking back about how fun and fast the pace of life were..without even realising it..

The world's full of problems..

gonna watch a lil of advent children later on..

What is this weird emotion am i feeling now?Today seems to be a weird day... or is it juz like.. one of those days.. Never meant to belong. The song.. the song played in my heart.. the constant tempo of the piano playing at the background.. emotion brought out by the violin.. i can feel it.. i can relate to it... songs of the heart.. nv played to others.. bum bum... bum bum bum... wad am i saying.. wth.. oh well.. muahaha.. study hard people..

Saw this pic on the left? It symbolises how much i know myself. Only that small little tip.. yup.. just that teenie weenie bit of me. Or maybe that's how much i know you, or that's how much you reveal your true self to me.

I reali think that this pic is gorgeous.. A picture speaks a thousand words.. To each and everyone who came across my blog and saw this pic. I wonder what you guys would think of it.. When you're depressed.. this reminds you of how deep you are in water.. how your world is sinking.. but to someone who is on cloud nine. This might mean unlimited dreams and hopes juz waiting to be discovered. AHH.. what am i talking about. I'm psychic in training.. muahahaha.

My motivation are quite on-off.. how to get it constantly on....??

Went back to my old blog which i started since Sec 2. It's always sweet to go back in time and try to re-live that moment of life. Every moment of life is precious, because of time.. the unstoppable flowing of something we cant see.. but only to see the effect of it. People grow old.. with regrets.. with memories.. as much as we could remember by that point of time.. everyday seem to be passing very quickly.. despite the long lectures in school.. the long waiting for buses.. transport and all those small things that we deem as insignificant are infact a part of our life too..

Share wif u guys a sms..:)

Happiness is somewhere between too little & too much. May you have just enough wealth to meet your needs. Enough poverty to learn how to work hard. Enough blessings to know that we love you. Enough problems so you dont forget us. Enough happiness to keep you sweet Enough trials to keep you happy. Enough sorrow to keep you human.

My mind is set. My path is.... clearer now.. I'm moving on.

Backstabber Alert Backstabber Alert

Nothing much happening around these days
Or is there something happening? And they're of the same thing?

Just Imagine.
All everyone is a piece of artwork to be crafted
The people around us make us who we are?
So if that's the case.. I'm just a piece of old, tattered and torn piece of art piece.
On me shows a small boy, with flowers in his hands, staring blankly into space.
You thought it look kinda boring, so you decided to add some colours onto it.
Therefore.. you added paint on areas where you thought could be made better.
As time passes.. You saw more places which could be done better.. so you added... and added
and added...

At this moment.. i felt heavy. Heavy of carrying all those you have placed on me..
I felt uncomfortable. By the colours that i'm showing others. That's not me. That's your artwork
Where's the original?

It's all hidden beneath that thick layer of paint which you added.
You then ask.. where is the original paint?? That old, torn and tattered but original true piece of artwork.. it simply hid itself.. that's as simple as that.

The End.

Lol.. I've not blogged for the past 19 days.. Kinda Lag huh..
Will try to remember everything i can.

Last Last Thursday was the Band outing.. lol. went to sch in the morning at 8 plus to bring the stuff over to East Coast Park Annie's house.. yeah. she live so far la.. ahaha.. she stays in this weird condominium n guess what.. the principal of TJC stays a few floors above her la..haha.. anyways.. went for biking a while.. did the double's one.. din cycle for sOoOoOOOooO Long sia.. cycled double wif annie.. was so afraid of killing her la.. omg.. it's like asking me to sing.. ok.. no link.. wadeva.. WELL... The 1st quarter of the journey was like a warm up session to me.. like testing the temperature before goin into some bathtub.. was quite ok.. suddenli.. dunno wad happened to me.. i seem to be enticed to the patch of green grassy grass.. n i headed for it. like... everything happened in a flash... i was knocked out.. ok la. dun hav tat part.. LOL.. juz din turn back on track n tripped i guess.. i was fine.. but Annie got blue black la.. oh man.. so guilty.. why not me.. ah... kuku ah de dun wan come.. den batches by batches.. the rest of them came.. lol.. it drizzled for a moment la.. but i guess the wind's on our side.. hahaha.. blow wind blow!! den played frisbee.. funny people la us.. dunno why.. but.. it's juz funny.. hhahah.. den after tat went for blading.. the sight was real funny.. cos onli regina n chester knows how to.. the rest of us are practically immobile and either that or we'll be sliding down some small hill.. backwards.. lol.

First Challenge.. Overcome THAT HUMP! yes.. the first few humps are indeed a challenge to us.. trying to push ourselves cross that 15 cm hump din end up as easy as it seems.. need to gather some momentum b4 we head for that obstacle.. first.. we goestun(backwards)...bad english.. ohwell! lol. den u blade blade n u're OVER!! *clap*.. lol.. the journey continues slowly.. SLOWLY.. until.. we meet mr Downhill.. phew.. tat was quite ok.. other than me tripping on some seed i tink.. but PHEW.. i'm still alright.. hahah.. it's ok to fall down though.. i guess all of us need a helping hand at some point of time of our lives dont we.. * Mine was there but you simply ignored it* den we headed back to our pit sia.. n we're dam late.. so pai seh.. felt so bad.. cos cant start the fire.. til Mr Tan came and Tada!~ the fire RosE!!! from the....... BBP pit. ahahahah.. did some cooking.. the sausages look so tempting sia.. but din eat the taiwan xiang cang.. so wasted la.. ok.. hahaha.. yah.. den stayed alll the way till 10 plus to clean the place up b4 we leave.. good citizens.. lol.. wad a day.. the next day was sch day sia..

Last Last Friday was Main's 17th Bday.. HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! Yay..haha.
That day was late sia.. ahha. Went to Cafe to celebrate.. of course.. i'm a poor kid.. so of course din buy much.. lol.. Went to take neoprints.. lol. Like so long nv use that machine le.. din look much of a difference i tot.. Haha.. den ask a lady to help us take photo sia.. then when i approach her she tot i was some salesman until she realised the colour i was wearing... N yah. She's from Ny too.. some years ago i guess.. hahah.. pai seh cant stay anymore.. hope u had fun! =))

Sat:
Woke up.. studied a little.. lol. Met up wif the YPSB flautists!
Went to Jurong East sia.. for ice blading.. lol.
Went all the way thr sia.. so far...
Haha.. Thanks Cladys for the cookies u made.. nice! =)
Hoped u all din fall v badly bah.. i tink everyone had fun yah?? Onli get the pants wet bah.. haha
Went to SWS youth concert at night.. played so many songs which i adore la.. from FFs..Games..
there's one song.. but oh well.. it's over.. lol.. the concert's fun though.. met my sec sch senior samuel n wei zhen.. lol the world is such a small place dun u tink...



END OF PART 1!!!!!!!! More coming up in nxt entry... =)

It's weird to see how the way things juz end up sometimes.
YPSB's concert was over on sat.
It started abruptly and ended the way it started.
In this major crossroad.. i wonder who's have i crossed.
Made an impact on and vice versa..

Through the language of music we speak,
Through the scores we unite..
Through the concert we part..
Was nostalgic when i saw u guys.
Reminded me of the times when i was still in sec sch.
All i can say is..
Memories, they shall remain..Sweet yet saturnine..
Things which r better if they stayed as the way they are..

YPSB was onli established for a month.. however.. the merriment will stay forever..

Things hav been happening again.. wait.. when did they ever stopped? Oh well.. lol. Hav a week break for band this week.. Everyone Study! =) count down for the day when all of us r back again! Am i just becoming like you? People say that we are moulded into who we r by the people around us.. so if they can change us.. y not we change ourselves..? Or blame our lives on others? Live life as if it's ours! (yes it is.)

I'm always looking out of my window.. peering through the glass to see that the sky is covered with dark clouds. I waited patiently for the first drop of blessing to touch the earth. But none came.. They gathered, they left silently as well..what does this all mean? There's not much time left. The decision was wrong right from the beginning i made it. Did i not see that things might juz happen the way? N it's happening exactly the way i thought it's going to be.. dam it..

HEY People!

Young People's Symphonic Band
29th July 2006
Nanyang Girl's Auditorium
Tickets Selling at $12 only!
Please leave a tag if you're interested. N let me know how to get back to you =)
Hope to see u there! =)

u're making me super confused of what i should be doin or reacting now. State of dilemma i would call it.

My hair is dropping at a real fast rate. Was juz thinking that my hair is growing in length.. BUT it's dropping in strends.. so no matter how fast they grow they'll juz detach themselfves n fall like sakuras in Japan.. die.. i can juz feel it's thickness decreasing.. oh man. scary la.. i dun wan b bald at the age of 18.haha..n my eye hurts. eyelid seem to b swollen.

The way things r happening r weird. I juz tot that i can dun care bout it n carry on wif my days as normal. but it seem that i cant. they juz keep popping out in my head. n i hav no idea wad r they trying to tel me.
dang. i'm speechless. literally.